Week 11 Teusday Afternoon Reserve Punter

Okay, I;d really appreciate that if I've got someething in my nose, that someone would tell me. It's not rude. It's the right thing to do. I'd much rather you let me know than walk around all day like that. It's like if someone's paants are unzipped, let them know. A second of embarassment pales in comparison to what you're sentencing them to otherwise.

People are going crazy with the release of the new Twilight movie. I don't get it, really, but I've come to grips with the fact that I won't get why an unoriginal story about werewolves and vampires is so enthralling. I also understand that people won't understand why I like some of the stuff I like, for example, superhero movies. I'm fine with that.

What I don't get, however, what I've never gotten is why people go so crazy for the release of a movie. I've never gotten that worked up for a movie. The movie I've gotten the most excited about pre-release was probably The Simpsons. Still, I'd never wait in line, in costume, to see it. In fact, it was just a matter of coincidence that I saw it the day it was released. Really, it was. We'd gone to the mall. While the girls were going to spend hours window shopping, a few of us decided to go see amoive. When we got to the theatre, we saw that the only movie starting within a half an hour was, in fact, The Simpsons.

To be fair, though, I'd been a fan of the show for 15 years and had been anticipating a movie for almost as long. So my excitement, was somewhat justified. Yet, the way people get when a new Star Wars comes out, or Harry Potter, or Twilight, seems beyond comprehension. I envy those people. To be that excited about something must be tremendous.

Anyway, on to the TARP

Week 11 Power Rankings

1.) Indy Colts
2.) N.O. Saints
3.) Minny Vikings
4.) N.E. Patriots
5.) S.D. Chargers
6.) Zona Cardinal
7.) Dallas Cowboys
8.) Cincy Bengals
9.) G.B. Packers
10.)

Week 11 Thoughts I Think I Thought About Thinking

1.) Terrible losses by both the Steelers and the Bengals. The Steelers loss was far worse. The Bengals were coming off a few huge divisional wins and travelled west to play a weak team with huge Jeff George Phenomenon potential. Classic trap game. That said, the way Cincy lost was horrible with Caldwell fumbling the kickoff at the end. Keep in mind though, Cincy's got two fluke losses this year.

2.) The Lions-Browns game was a picture perfect example of why my idea for a the NFL just putting the crappy teams together. Yes, you'll take away some huge upsets like Chiefs-Steelers and Raiders-Bengals, but you make up for that with absolute classics like Lions-Browns. Forget the UFL, I'd much rather watch this. Anyway, as for the game itself, the ending was tremendous. Enough's been said about how gutsy Matt Stafford was, don't need me to harp on it. What I do want to talk about is the two coaches.

First, Jim Caldwell, what are you doing? That's your franchise running out there with a potentially seperated shoulder! This game's not that important. You can't risk the health of your organization's future. You could see see Stafford mouthing after the play, "It popped out!" while holding his left shoulder. Dumb.

3.) I am not fan of Eric Mangini. Never liked him as a head coach. Liked him even less with how he handled the QB situation all this year. However, I'm hearing people ripping Mangini for calling a timeout after the pass interference call. Either to argue the call or, as he said,, to get the right personel on the field. Critics are saying that the timeout was dumb because it allowed Stafford to come back in to the game to toss the gwinning TD, he wouldn't have been aloowed in otherwise. There is absolutely no way Mangini should've known Stafford would return from the hit he took.

Whatever the reason for him calling timeout, it wasn't a terrible decision. It turned out to hurt him, but he did nothing wrong there. This is a classic example of media reacting to a result rather than the decision. If Stafford came back in and thre an incomplete pass, or got hurt, Caldwell would've been destroyed for letting Stafford back in. Now, though< Mangini gets ripped solely because they lost.

4.) It's got to be said, Brett Favre is having an unbelievable season, all things considered. Media love aside, Favre deserves a ton of credit. Not saying he doesn't get enough, we all know he does, but still he's playing great.

5.) With all the throwback jerseys the NFL's played with this year, it was only a matter of time before they played a "Throwback Offense" game like they did with Cowboys-Redskins.

6.) After just a little more maturation and consistancy with his intermediate routes, DeSean Jackson will joing Larry Fitzgerald and the Johnsons in the elite group of WRs. Moreover, he and Maclin have the potential to be the best WR tandem in the NFL down the road.

7.) The Texans lost last night, partly because they decided to settle for a 49 yard FG atempt for the win. Most people are saying that the Texans had enough time to run another play, call timeout, and set up for a shorter FG try. This is true, but the kicker's got to make th kick. An NFL kicker should be able to make that kick. No, it's not a chip shot by any means, but it's not 59 yards. That's your job, make the kick.

8.) Jay Cutler is rattled. That's the only explanation for why he's missing WRs running wide open deep. It seems he's trying to avoid a pick so much that he's trying to be too perfect. He wasn't putting any air on the deep balls. A bad NFL QB could make the throws he was missing.

9.) I've no idea why Rex Ryan hasn't benched the Sanchise. Not to start a game, but during a game that he's stinking up the joint, sit him down. Give him a breather. Let him watch. Tell him he's going to start the following week, no problem, but let him sit for a half.

10.) Note to the Jets and their great CB Revis: You got psyched out so badly this week. The Jets wanted to make sure Moss didn't go off because of all the pre game talking, they forgot to cover Welker. Even after the game, the Jets wanted to point out how great Revis played (Moss did catch a TD in front of him). You know, as great as Revis is, why not put him on the guy who's single handedly murdering your team in the passing game. The Jets wouldn't do it, it might've been percieved as if Revis was scared of Moss or something, so Welker did whatever he wanted. Make adjustments people!

Limerick of the Week

The Chicago Bear train has run of the track
The Monsters of the Midway have gotten real whack
Cutler throwin a pick
Didn't make me as sick
As Devin Hester showing us his crack

Peace

Week 10 Tuesday Afternoon Reserve Punter

Got drawn in to watching a few hours of the History Channel this past weekend. It got me thinking how ridiculously unreliable history is. One special was on the Battle Of Thermopylae. The famous last stand that the movie 300 was based on, where 300 Spartans (Joined by 1000 other Greeks shhhh!) stood up and got slaughtered by a gigantic Persian army. My big issue with the historical account, as was the case with a lot of the real old stories, there was one historian who took account of the battle. One guy. How do we know his credibility? Is it at all possible that the armies were evenly numbered, but the Greeks got slaughtered? The entire account is scribed by a Greek, who could have written anything to make his side look better. Not possible? Forget possible, it's friggin probable.

Yet, we choose to believe what this guy says, but people choose not to believe religious history. Be it Biblical history, Quranic history, people choose not to consider them reliable, but one Greek saying that 300 Spartans fought against hundreds of thousands Persians? Completely credible. They even had a quote from him when he was recounting a meeting before the battle. The Persians sent over an officer telling the Greeks to stand down because they were grossly outnumbered, saying "Our arrows will block out the Sun." A Greek officer replies, "Then we shall fight our battle in the shade!" You're telling me that exchange happened? That doesn't sound a bit like embellishment?

Week 10 Power Rankings

1.) Indy Colts

2._ N.O. Saints

3.) Minny Vikings

4.) Cincy Bengals

5.) N.E. Patriots

6.) S.D. Chargers

7.) Zona Cardinals

8.) Pitt Steelers

9.) Denver Broncos

Week 10 Thoughts I Think I Thought About Thinking

1.) After a football weekend like this past one, I wish I wrote a MARP. Anyway, let's start with the hot topic of the week: BB's decision to go for it on fourth and 2. Not sure if it was the right call, but it was not as horrible a call as its being made out to be.A call should not be judged by its outcome. Peter King does it perfectly, he compares it to Grady Little. Little did not make a terrible call, he stuck with a tiring ace in a must win rather than to turn to a terrible bullpen that lost them many games that year, including that one. They lost, so he got ripped. I hate second guessing.

2.) Now, as for the call itself, let's think of it this way. If they converted, the Pats win. If they don't they all but guarantee that the Colts win. So basically, it's like going for two down by one with no time left, something I've always backed. Now I realize it's not a perfect parallel, when down by two the team is down, but it is comparable in that you decide to try to win with the ball in your hands. When a coach goes for two and the win and succeeds, the media loves him. So why rip the coach in this situation?

3.) I heard people talking about MJD's kneel down. Down by one with about a minute left, the Jags had the ball around the Jets 10. The Jets decide to let the Jags score so they could get the ball back with time left. MJD took a knee at the one. He not only ran more clock, but also picked up a first down so the Jags could run out the clock and kick an extra point to win. I heard people questioning if it was the right move citing the fact that something could've gone terribly wrong on the kick. Yes, that is true, but you can't play that way. With that argument, something could go horribly wrong when the Jets get the ball. If you can't convert an extra point with no time left, you didn't deserve to win. Also, if it was such a terrible decision, why did it upset the Jets? The J-E-T-S JetsJetsJets wanted him to score. It seems fairly obvious that what the opposition wants is usually directly in conflict with what's good for you.

4.) The NFL needs to step in when it comes to concussions. A concussed player needs to be put on IR. Don't mess around. There are whispers that Westbrook's career might be over because he came back too fast. Forget his career, think about his life! You don't want your players to have serious head problems after they retire. Then when you consider the fact that Westbrook's a running back, it makes zero sense. The defense knows he's coming back from a concussion, they're going to pound his head as much as possible. The NFL needs to step in, hire all the medical staff, and decide that a concussed player is not eligible to play for the remainder of the year.

5.) It has to be said, the assuming Orton's healthy, as of now the Broncos made out tremendously from their preseason trade with Chicago.

6.) Can we just put the Browns, Chiefs, Raiders, and Lions in one division and just have them play each other every week?Nobody wants to see Ravens - Browns, so let's do it. It doesn't have to be permanent. This division would not get a playoff spot and the teams will be like the England Premiership, where if a team is crappy for a couple of year and a member of the division is showing signs of life, the flip flop. Why not?

7.) One last thing about BB's decision. He did make a huge mistake in that last drive. He burned all his timeouts, uselessly, and was unable to challenge the fourth down play. That was inexcusable.

8.) Okay, Mangini needs to step away from the quarterbacks. Let Quinn play out the rest of the year. You're not going anywhere, so find out what you have.

9.) Memo to the Jets defense: Make one, just one, late game stand then you could talk.

10.) There will not be an undefeated team this year..

Limerick of the Week

There's waddles Rex Ryan

Stating how his defense be flyin'

They talk real tough

This month's been rough

And now the coah has started cryin'

Peace

Week 9 Tuesday Afternoon Reserve Punter

In the past few years, well, decade I guess, the trend in Hollywood has been to make nostalgic movies. Movies for adults about characters they grew up with as kids. At first, these movies were targeted for all audiences, but lately they've gone more to just adults. Movies like The Drak Knight and Wtachmen especially. There've been movies about comic book heroes, cartoons (Transformers, G I Joe), and video games (Doom, Final Fantasy, Mortal Kombat, Street Fighter). My question is where is the Legend of Zelda movie?

It seems painfully logical to make such a movie. The stories are basically written out for you within the games. Fantasy movies like LOTR have gotten great success. With all the volumes in the Zelda series, it could become a franchise. I don't understand why it hasn't been don yet. You could take almost any game and make it into two, not one, movies. Like Ocarina of Time could be split into a young Link and adult Link movie. Link to the Past could easily be done with part one being the quest for the Master Sword and part two being the journeys in the Dark World. Each game has a great story written out perfectly. All that needs to be done is to have it adapted.

So why hasn't it been done?

Week 9 Power Rankings

1.) N.O. Saints

2.) Indy Colts

3.) Minny Vikings

4.) N.E. Patriots

5.) Pittsburgh Steelers

6.) Cincy Bengals

7.) Denver Broncos

8.) Dallas Cowboys

9.) S.D. Chargers

10.) Philly Eagles

Week 9 Thoughts I Think I Thought About Thinking

1.) and 2.) Everyone's focusing in on the conservative play calling down the stretch of the Giants - Chargers game. A game the Giants had to have. Up by three, the defense picked Rivers off and returned to the Chargers four. From there the Giants ran four plays. The first one, a run that took the ball to the one, was penalized for holding so it became first and goal from the 14. From their the Giants ran the ball three times, forcing the Chargers to burn two timeouts. Giants kicked a field goal and gave SD the ball with over two minutes left to play. They proceeded to march down the field and score the winning TD. The play calling issue arises with the three runs. Manning had been playing a very good game, so why not give him at least one shot at the end zone to put the game away? That's playing not to lose in a near must win game.

That's the issue most people are bringing up. My issue is with the coaching handbook that everyone seems to follow. This might sound crazy at first, but my issue is with the fourth down play call. In my opinion, that was a four down situation. Eli Manning said after the Super Bowl that in a game winning drive he'd rather be down by four than three. The reason being that down by three you tend to get safe once in gield goal range and play for a tie. The same could be said about six. If an offense would rather be down by four than three, then they'd rather be down by 6 than 3. It's the same thing. So on fourth and goal at the 4 you go for the end zone and the win. If you fail, you give the opponents the ball at their own four down by three. They're looking for a field goal. That's it. Of course, if there was under a minute left, you kick the FG, but over two minutes with the opponents holding one more timeout. I say you go for it. The risk/reward factor is worth it. If you fail, you'll get ripped in the media, but that's the problem as well. Too many coaches play it safe so they won't get ripped in the media.

3.) Another thing that came out of that game was the re hashing of the 2004 draft and who made the right move and who's the best QB. The three QBs in question all have different skill sets. Ben is the most physically gifted of the group; strongest arm and scrambling. Rivers is the most accurate of the three, but is a statue. Manning is the headiest QB of the group, sets protection calls out blitzes and audibles as well as anyone in the game not named Manning. As for which teams got the right guy and who got the wrong one, I think the way it broke down, each QB went to the best situation for him and each team got the right QB for their organization.

4.) I was going to say how dumb it was for Tampa, a winless team at the time, to wear throwbacks to a time when they managed to go a whole season winless, but they won. That shut me up. Maybe they should wear those until they lose.

5) I seriously hope that there is no punishment for Ochocinco for trying to "bribe" the refs. Ochocinco gets annoying at times, but he was just goofing around. No harm done.

6,) I've come 180 degrees on the Wildcat. Sort of. Only with the Dolphins. Most teams use the Wildcat as trick plays, but Miami keeps it as a key part of their offense. Also, they've got it mastered. They're willing to use it on any situation and use it effectively.

7.) I'm hearing a ton of praise for the job Jim Caldwell is doing for Indy and I'm not sure I agree. The more I see of the Colts, the more I'm convinced that the entire offense is run by Peyton. The defense is not too good. The whole team is the offense and the whole offense is Peyton so the whole team is Peyton.

8.) This makes me wonder how good a coach Tony Dungy actually was. I've always found him a bit overrated. I've heard people argue that Jon Gruden won in Tampa with Dungy's team so that's a win for Dungy, but I'd argue that if that's true and the only difference in the team not winning one year and winning the next year was the head coach. Then the problem was probably the head coach. Then he goes to Indy, a team ready to win. A team with one of the greatest QBs in NFL history. A team's whose only weakness was defense so they bring in a defensive minded coach. Defense does not improve and they manage to win only one SUper Bowl though having the best team in the league for a few years. I think Dungy gets HOF credit because everyone wants a great black head coach so his credentials were inflated. Luckily though, there is a great black head coach in the NFL, he's in Pittsbuirgh. And there's another one growing in San Francisco.

9.) Cornerbacks do not make enough money. Simple. That's the reason there's such a short supply of great ones. If a guy with that much athleticism can catch, he plays reciever. They make more money. It's only if his hands aren't great that he goes to DB. If, however, DBs were given more money, money that they deserve because great DBs change a game, and publicity great athletes would jump on that side as well because there's less competition there.

10.) I'd sign up for a Colts Saints SB right now.

Limerick of the Week

The 08 Lions have nothing to fear

They're drinking champagne or beer

Tampa one their game

To avoid their shame

0-16 is safe for another year.

Peace

Week 8 Tuesday Afternoon Reserve Punter

Just came from fulfilling my civil obligation of voting for one jerk who doesn't give a damn about me, nor can relate to me at any level, over another jerk who doesn't give a damn about me, nor can relate to me at any level, on the sole basis that Jerk A is affiliated with the political party that seems less likely to run this country to the ground. Oversimplified? Possibly. Ignorant? Probably. Mostly National? Definitely.

I'm glad election season's over. Absolutely hate political ads. They're so obviously slanted and contain zero pertinent information. What all political ads boil down to is two things. First, they'll basically slander the opponent by taking one thing he or she said out of context, blow it way out of proportion, and somehow tie that in to everything the opponent stands for. Oh and the opponent's image will always, ALWAYS, be in black and white and he'll be making some weird face. Then they'll show whoever the ad's for in full color interacting with families, mostly children, without a coast and the sleeves of his dress shirt rolled up. How that means I should vote for him, I don't know, but apparently it works. Truth be told, the more ads I see for a politician, the more I begin to dislike him.

Okay, first a disclaimer before this week's TARP: My family pulled one of it's vintage scheduling screwjobs on me and I was unable to watch any football on Sunday. None. So, unfortunately, I won't be able to analyze the games as brilliantly as I usually do. Most of this will be from box scores, highlights, and other columns.

Week 8 Power Rankings

1.) N.O. Saints
2.) Indy Colts
3.) N.E. Patriots
4.) Pittsburgh Steelers
5.) Minny Vikings
6.) Denver Broncos
7.) Cincy Bengals
8.) Philley Eagles
9.) Atlanta Falcons
10.) Baltimore Ravens

Week 8 Thoughts I Think I Thought About Thinking

1.) As much as it would have sucked, I wish I'd seen the Giants game. I could have give you a better thought of what I think they did wrong. Fortunately, though, the answer seems clear: Everything. I've no idea what happened to Manning. He started off the season tremendously, but has faltered the pass two games. The Saints exposed the Giants safeties and every team knows it not. They still can't get pressure. Speaking of which, I'm done with this whole moving defensive ends all along the line to confuse the offense and get more pressure. No. It's a like the Wildcat. You can be successful with it, but if that's all you have you're in trouble. They need to get back to lining up traditional tackles in the middle to get a push and have the ends try to come around the edge.

2.) "If Favre does play this year, the Vikings will lose at Lambeau" Just the type of foresight you've come to expect from the TARP.

3.)- 9) Really should've known that Young would play well. He's a prefect candidate for the Jeff George Phenomenon (someone else has probably printed this, sorry for that. But I have had this idea for a while). This happens when a physically gifted QB who's been a backup for a while finally gets ino the starting lineup after much clamoring by the fans. The QB will usually have to have a different skill set than the starter, but will almost always have one fatal flaw. The backup QB gets in and defenses aren't really ready for him and he goes on a hot stretch. This stretch varies in time. It could be a few games, half a season, a whole season. It's just until one defense finally says "Wait a minute, he's Jeff George!" and capitalizes on his fatal flaw and everyone remembers why he was a backup.

Notable Jeff George phenoms : Kerry Collins, Alex Smith, Old Randall Cunningham, Old Warren Moon, Doug Flutie, Tommy Maddox, Derek Anderson, Kent Graham, Jeff George (Washington), Jeff George (Minny), AJ Feely, the Detmers, Rob Johnson, Quincy Carter, Trent Edwards, Danny Kanell, Chad Henne, Vinny Testaverde, Jon Kitna

The key to the Jeff George Phenomenon is that defenses should not be ready for him at all. That's where Eric Mangini messed up trying to hide who his starting QB was at the start of the year. If he'd said at the start of training camp "Quinn is our guy" and didn't waver at all, Anderson would have performed when Quinn was pulled. Hiding your starter nullifies all Jeff George potential.

Of course, there are players like Brady and Warner who go on to play really well. They're not Jeff George phenoms, they were great QBs in hiding. They were given a shot and they showed their talent. You have to disappear in to relative obscurity to be a Jeff George Phenom. You disappear on to some team's roster waiting to for your chance to be reborn as another Jeff George Phenom.

10.) Was it cheap that I wasted so many numbers on one topic? Yeah, probably, but again didn't see the games, don't get paid, and the Yanks are in the World Series. Any complaints should be sent to my editor.

Limerick of the Week

The Giants were destroyed by the Eagles
Mistreated like a team full of Smeagols
Don't see how.
They swin it all now.
They're best player's Jeff Feagles.

Peace.